Nailed on certainties in life

[red_harrington]

When you open a packet of biscuits, the first one is always broken

 

[Scubahood]

Death.

 

[Aet290204]

That you will die.
Scubes beat me to it

 

[magic]

When you're in a rush the taxi is always early

 

[Lemmy_kilmister]

When you open a box of paracetamol you always get the leaflet end.

 

[futureboy]

Inserting a memory stick:

Side A - nope, not that way up
Side B - not that one either
Side A - ah, there we are

 

[Billyzin]

The prince who doesn't sweat is found not guilty.

 

[Erimus74]

When you put something in the microwave with a handle & the timer bell goes the handle is always facing away from the door, ahhhhh

 

[Soutra]

Death and taxes.

 

[Priv]

Just as your getting the hang of being a parent and life is getting back to normal, the Mrs will end up pregnant again

 

[Randy]

Been stuck on Marton Road at the parkway turn off at 5:30pm every weekday.

Tesco's self serve checkouts requiring staff authentication for anything under a tenner.

 

[Kosovo]

Man Utd picked for the FA Cup TV game

 

[Estonboy]

Put your car in reverse as somebody walks behind!

 

[Cardiffdaffs]

When you open a box of paracetamol you always get the leaflet end.

This. Murphy's law.

 

[parmoboy]

When you go to use an ATM there's always somebody else using it, even if it's 3am in the morning.

Then you have to awkwardly stand behind them or to the side of them at a distance which ensures they're not made to feel you're about to mug them.

 

[borgelite]

Politicians tell porkies

 

[jonny_greenings_sock]

You will always bump into someone you know and respect when carrying industrial quantities of loo roll home from the supermarket, and it will never not be awkward af

You also can’t just buy loo roll, you have to get some chicken or something or you might as well have a sign on your head saying ‘gasping for a poo’

 

[asredastheycome]

The Boro will always break your heart but you will still love them forever.

 

[S7DiscoDown]

No matter what petrol pump I que for the person in front will 'faff about'.

Seriously.... What do they do when they get back in the car? It's a usually women going through handbag/glove compartment/something on the back seat.

Please no 'get an EV'

 

[xxlshirts_fit_all]

When you open a box of paracetamol you always get the leaflet end.

That’s just part of the 50/50/90% rule isn’t it?….

50% chance of getting it right but a 90% result of getting it wrong…

also applies to the usb stick… however there’s another variable in that you can try It both ways and still get it wrong…