Struggling at my new job - help!

borolad259 said:

Good advice here. I would just add that worry and anxiety over what other people think about you (ie colleagues/managers etc) is counter-productive.
Try to develop more of a "don't give a monkeys what you think" attitude and instead, focus purely on your own performance and your own satisfaction.

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This is also a great point. Nearly every time I've gone for a promotion I've thought "this is it now, this is my level, no interested in going further". Then a year or 2 down the line I start to feel differently and notice there are some right idiots working at the level above. Sometimes out of their depth, but it doesn't seem to bother them.

There's something to be said for a lack of self awareness. But not something you can control. However you can get it into the mindset of caring less about how you're perceived. I can guarantee there'll be people doing the same job (or higher) as you who are utterly useless.

"Someone with half your IQ is making 10x as much as you because they aren't smart enough to doubt themselves".

(Ed Latimor).

I want to thank everyone of you that have taken the time to give me some advice here. Amazing and some really good advice. This week I’ll get started on addressing areas that I want to improve in and bring that up with my manager. I’ll also try and give myself a bit of a break! I do take a lot of notes at work to be fair so I’ll keep doing that too. I will also save this thread for when I’m having a bad day! And as for imposter syndrome, that really is how I feel a lot of the time. Like since I was born basically

Seriously though big thanks! UTB!

Scrug said:

I think everyone feels like this at the start of a new job mate, especially when it’s a drastic change from what you were doing previous.

I’d worked for Aldi for 10 years, applied for assistant manager position, they told me I wasn’t ready (despite having done the job through covid), then hired someone they wanted me to train. I handed my notice in, applied for a store manager position with another company on a whim. Got it. And I’ve had imposter syndrome pretty much every day since. However last month I passed my years probation and feel like I’m finally settling in.

You’ll get there

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Happy to hear you’re settling in Scrug! We’ll done for persisting.

HolgateCorner said:

Some excellent advice above.

You sound highly motivated and focussed to me and brave enough to change careers at 32.

One thing I would add is don’t ever overestimate the ability and intelligence of those around you, they are only people at work like you.

I post with 40 years experience in the workplace.

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Means a lot that cheers mate

I remember getting my first job in design after doing a journalism degree, I'd had prior experience in college etc but still, it took me a while to get to grips with it and I was doing the same, constantly asking colleagues on how to do this and that.

One tip I would suggest is to take as much time as you can without it affecting your social life to learn about the role outside of work. I was practicing on my own back using the work software at home and after a couple months or so found it becoming second nature. I was also watching a lot of YouTube about the subject and bought a few books. It helps if you're interested in it!

Even now, 7 years later sometimes I find myself thinking I'm not good enough for this because it's not the area I trained in but I've had two promotions since starting and currently the most experienced designer at the company - I put that down to imposter syndrome, something very common in creative roles.

Now when I work with new starters and they are the ones asking the questions I actually prefer it to them sitting there and not asking questions out of fear.

Change is difficult for the vast majority of people. You have convinced others to enable you in making a brave move, a big change. They wanted you, remember that.
Remember every little success, every nice comment you get, as they will snowball.
You have a lovely appetite to learn and people warm to that. Your colleagues all around can help, not just your line manager or co-worker.
Give yourself a break, you are just two months in.
If they are any sort of Company and have good operators, then there will be a structured learning and development culture and environment; with standards of performance, objectives, personal development plans and support processes. But how you commit to them and the people you work with are crucial too.
I back you to feel very differently in a few months time.

hello Jimmyjazz, I hope you find all the advice on this post useful.
A couple of things.. you never said why you left your job in construction.. did you need a new challenge? You also mention imposter syndrome as being with you all of your life.
I wouldn't worry too much about your job, in fact I wouldn't worry about it all, just do you best and be happy with that. If the job doesn't fit you then don't get anxious trying to make it fit, it's not worth it. You are what you are and your institution should be happy with that.

The thing you could start looking into is your self, your low self esteem, as this seems to be the issue. Working in a corporate world I imagine this to be very competitive with little room for self-doubt or fragile egos. However, if it gets to the stage when you've tried all the things recommended in this post and things do not get better then I would listen to myself and get out of that working environment. If it still doesn't seem right for you then act on it. Nor should you see this as failure, more like being true to yourself.

Good luck, and keep us posted.

Making mistakes is part of the learning process. I find I have to make a mistake at times to learn and even then I can repeat them, but less often. Marketing is a big area, some jobs are called marketing but in effect are sales jobs. I was taught marketing is the development of product and and services to as closely as possible meet the needs and wants of effective customers. If you are involved is persuading someone to buy a well developed product/service that can't be modified much you are in sales.

You will know if the job and career is right for you after a while, for most people is about trial and error too. That while can vary from a week to 5 or 6 years, in my opinion.

When I was in my early twenties I wanted a career in Marketing and it was really tough to get a job as a marketing graduate. Alot of the roles went to attractive looking young women that presented extremely well. In the end I went into purchasing and supply and ended up as a purchasing manager by I was 29, but then changed to teaching because that was where my heart was and where I had the more natural aptitudes for, relative to other people. But for me it took time to find that out. Even in teaching I was using marketing skills as I developed teaching material and teaching methods to improve the learning of my students.

As time went on I discovered I was much more a Peter Taylor than as Brian Clough, operating as a number 2 rather than a number 1. The skill then is find a number 1 that fully appreciates you and looks after you. I sometime see people trying to be a Cloughie for the status and pay, but better suited to a different role.

I've changed jobs / got promoted a few times over the years. I've come to accept that for the first 6 months I will feel completely out of my comfort zone, that's just normal.

Some good advice on here - but keep it simple, follow TFG's suggestion.

TheYorkshireTerrier said:

I remember getting my first job in design after doing a journalism degree, I'd had prior experience in college etc but still, it took me a while to get to grips with it and I was doing the same, constantly asking colleagues on how to do this and that.

One tip I would suggest is to take as much time as you can without it affecting your social life to learn about the role outside of work. I was practicing on my own back using the work software at home and after a couple months or so found it becoming second nature. I was also watching a lot of YouTube about the subject and bought a few books. It helps if you're interested in it!

Even now, 7 years later sometimes I find myself thinking I'm not good enough for this because it's not the area I trained in but I've had two promotions since starting and currently the most experienced designer at the company - I put that down to imposter syndrome, something very common in creative roles.

Now when I work with new starters and they are the ones asking the questions I actually prefer it to them sitting there and not asking questions out of fear.

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Yeh I have been doing extra work outside of work. I’ve been doing some Adobe courses and web development. Always got a book on the go too. Sounds like you’ve excelled at work though, happy for ya and hope it continues. Thanks for you advice, it’s clear I’m not the only person to go through this, which is reassuring!

Bristolboro said:

hello Jimmyjazz, I hope you find all the advice on this post useful.
A couple of things.. you never said why you left your job in construction.. did you need a new challenge? You also mention imposter syndrome as being with you all of your life.
I wouldn't worry too much about your job, in fact I wouldn't worry about it all, just do you best and be happy with that. If the job doesn't fit you then don't get anxious trying to make it fit, it's not worth it. You are what you are and your institution should be happy with that.

The thing you could start looking into is your self, your low self esteem, as this seems to be the issue. Working in a corporate world I imagine this to be very competitive with little room for self-doubt or fragile egos. However, if it gets to the stage when you've tried all the things recommended in this post and things do not get better then I would listen to myself and get out of that working environment. If it still doesn't seem right for you then act on it. Nor should you see this as failure, more like being true to yourself.

Good luck, and keep us posted.

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Thanks BB. Yup wanted a new challenge and didn’t want to do the same thing all my life. I see what you’re saying about looking internally but I think it’s my work is mostly influencing my self esteem atm. If I can be improve and feel I contribute more I’m sure I’ll enjoy this job.

@GazBoro and @Artie helped me out with some management issues last year. There advice was sound. Worth asking the pair of them.

I must have had imposter syndrome for 40 years because I wake up every work day thinking "what the **** am I doing?"

But I'm still here and employers keep giving me work.

I do hope things improve for you @jimmyjazz but it may take time. Meanwhile, stick at it fella

jimmyjazz said:

Thanks BB. Yup wanted a new challenge and didn’t want to do the same thing all my life. I see what you’re saying about looking internally but I think it’s my work is mostly influencing my self esteem atm. If I can be improve and feel I contribute more I’m sure I’ll enjoy this job.

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I think its very normal that a job effects your self esteem, after all its what you put all of yourself into and for most of the time. I've been teaching for 25 years and it took me a long time to gain real confidence in this job., for many years if lessons didn't go well then I felt bad and took it home, and wanted to give up. These days I teach, give it all when I'm doing it, but don't emotionally invest in it to the extent that the job defines me. Some days good, some days not so good, as it is. You are always a lot more than your job so try to remember that when the doubts set in.

Take care.

As long as your manager isn't calling you a developmental employee in public you're all good.

Good advice up and down the thread, and to be honest the fact you have that self awareness over your short comings is a massive help for you and your managers.

Can I ask, although you have changed from construction role to marketing are you still working in the same sector? what have you done in your career to date that can help you bring a different approach/perspective to your work? Someone who has got their boots dirty can be invaluable on a marketing team.

a couple more points - marketing is an ever-changing field, with everyone always looking to find that silver bullet that proves that all marketing efforts are not in vain, and from working in B2B comms for 16 years I can tell you that more often than not the answer you get to is a best guess. So don't worry if your work raises more questions than answers - that's always going to be the case.

Finally, marketing and comms industry is very good for networking events/seminars/industry exhibitions, so if there's a particular area you are struggling with there is more than likely going to be an event/webinar/meet up with experienced people sharing their solutions and approaches to aspects of the role. This is another good way of demonstrating you are trying to learn - it is recordable time, and there's usually a free beer involved with the in-person events.

Can't add much to the already top notch advice you've already been given on this thread other than the very fact that you feel the way you do means you WILL succeed.
Few these days either care or are willing to accept their own failings and hats off to your manager for understanding and a willingness to give you time to improve.
I've been in that feeling of helplessness at work before but unlike you didn't share it until it was nearly too late.
Good luck and stick in.

It's very important to remain pragmatic though and constantly ask yourself if this job is suited to you. If you feel you are failing and keeping ploughing on and on it can have a big impact on your health and wellbeing. I have seen it with a couple of people, one of who was sick for three years and unable to work, he aged about 10 years in those three years too.

Think of it in football terms, sometimes a move to a different club doesn't work out and it can get worse the more games you actually play. A change of clubs can mean a change of fortune for whatever reason.

Good luck but don't be afraid to walk away if it gets too much.

Changing technology is affecting most jobs - some jobs might be described as marketing, but turn out to be more IT roles, especially if you are seen as the youngster in the department. The speed of change is increasing too.

I got a well paid job as a senior buyer, but soon found out an older manager wanted me working on spreadsheets most of the day. I had zero interest in this and there are people out there with more aptitude than me at working on spreadsheets. So I handed my notice in. What I learnt was to ask more at interview and get a job where I had more control.

Redwurzel said:

Changing technology is affecting most jobs - some jobs might be described as marketing, but turn out to be more IT roles, especially if you are seen as the youngster in the department. The speed of change is increasing too.

I got a well paid job as a senior buyer, but soon found out an older manager wanted me working on spreadsheets most of the day. I had zero interest in this and there are people out there with more aptitude than me at working on spreadsheets. So I handed my notice in. What I learnt was to ask more at interview and get a job where I had more control.

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Very true. Teaching is now tech-led. Teachers and pupils just plug themselves in.