How do you deal with getting asked for money.

Blf

Blf

Well-known member
Long story
Out with son at Leeds Xmas Market. We were stood talking and entertaining our 18 month old granddaughter when a man walked up very quickly and said can you buy me a cuppa and a sandwich. We were a bit taken by surprise and all said no practically together. He walked away and I felt terrible the way I just said no as I usually do try and help out.. He was around 25 scottish and was in a bit of a state.Wearing really scruffy clothes he looked dirty and had a lot of sores on his face . I went after him said sorry and that I would get him a cuppa and a sarny. We were surrounded by food outlets so I moved towards the nearest one.He stopped me saying just give me the money and he would go to McDonald's further into the city centre. I said no I would buy them here as I only had a £20 note. He told me to F off then. I walked back to my family and started talking and he came up behind me asking if he had "made the wrong choice pal" He was getting quite aggressive and I could see my Mrs getting a bit scared. I asked him to leave us alone and he swore again. I told him to go or I would get the police .He said go on then. I was a bit annoyed by then and told him to p off away from us and we moved away. He was just swearing at us as we went.
It all went to rat crap very quickly and its left me feeling a bit annoyed..
How do you respond?
 
Don`t usually carry cash with me so it`s a simple I don`t have cash and if i`m asked outside a non food shop I leave it there.

However if it`s outside a food shop i`ll always offer to buy food if they ask.

In your scenario I`d have been wary to offer anything, I usually find that folk asking usually position themselves outside a shop, not wander around asking
 
All you can do is walk away... Its really difficult when this happens but I guess you have to recognise that whatever problems he has going on would lead to the same reaction with anyone else. I never give money in these situations as my line of work tells me it doesn't go on food. I usually do as you did and offer to buy food and it's usually great fully received. I'll never forgot I guy I knew reasonably well refusing my offer of a 4 pack of greggs Sausage rolls and some doughnuts but requesting some pasta with sundried tomatoes and feta! He got it too and water rather than full fat cola!
 
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Blf said:
Long story
Out with son at Leeds Xmas Market. We were stood talking and entertaining our 18 month old granddaughter when a man walked up very quickly and said can you buy me a cuppa and a sandwich. We were a bit taken by surprise and all said no practically together. He walked away and I felt terrible the way I just said no as I usually do try and help out.. He was around 25 scottish and was in a bit of a state.Wearing really scruffy clothes he looked dirty and had a lot of sores on his face . I went after him said sorry and that I would get him a cuppa and a sarny. We were surrounded by food outlets so I moved towards the nearest one.He stopped me saying just give me the money and he would go to McDonald's further into the city centre. I said no I would buy them here as I only had a £20 note. He told me to F off then. I walked back to my family and started talking and he came up behind me asking if he had "made the wrong choice pal" He was getting quite aggressive and I could see my Mrs getting a bit scared. I asked him to leave us alone and he swore again. I told him to go or I would get the police .He said go on then. I was a bit annoyed by then and told him to p off away from us and we moved away. He was just swearing at us as we went.
It all went to rat crap very quickly and its left me feeling a bit annoyed..
How do you respond?
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You made the right choice, I’d of probably snapped back at the aggression and possibly done something id later regret especially if it escalated. You’ve nothing to feel guilty of. Giving people like that cash is a terrible idea.
 
It’s a pretty standard approach unfortunately. There’s a few very familiar faces in Leeds constantly pulling the same trick everyday.
 
Here in California the Government gives the homeless, drugs, cash and food but they still come after you, so it’s a no win situation in my book. Maybe just round up your occasional Walmart bill and be done with it.
 
You did the right thing, you felt guilty tried to rectify the situation and he wasnt happy with your offer.

There's not a chance that money would have been spent in Mcdonalds .. if he wanted someone to buy him a maccys then beg outside the place!
 
I'm sorry but you shy Tories masquerading as left wing rejoiners on here needs to end

BLF you're a Tory who didn't vote Corbyn

Corbyn stated his first task was to end homelessness and you brag you didn't vote for him

BLF this is what you voted for
 
when i leave the house i make sure i have loose change in a pocket, inc pound coins - if im asked - i give a little of it away.

theres not many days i dont give money away - if people are having to ask theyre in a bad situation and place.

on one occasion i was giving a couple of quid and some smash to a youngish 20 odd of age woman - when another person passed me by and a few seconds later as i walked away said "it'll all go on drink and drugs"

i said to this person - "if i was on the streets and having to ask strangers for money, nowhere to live or wash and without a change of clothes - id be spending it on drink and drugs as well - there but for the grace of god go i & you"

i couldnt care less about what they spend it on- if i give out around £5/6 to 2 or 3 different people - its the price of a pint and it wouldnt do me any harm to have one less pint, but it would give 3 other people a little bit of something good, even if its to realise that not all humans are cold heartless selfish cuuhnts.

the whole world is telling them everyday NO.


ive never had an ounce of trouble off a person speaking or asking me for some loose change.


A little more soul and a little less ego.
 
Blf said:
Zzzzzzzzz what a bore you are. Goodbye you will be very lonely on my ignore list that now totals 1
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The guy who's intellect is to admit he didn't vote corbyn

But moan that Labour's priority should be to win

FMTTM logic winner of the year
 
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Johnny Vincents Motorbike said:
when i leave the house i make sure i have loose change in a pocket, inc pound coins - if im asked - i give a little of it away.

theres not many days i dont give money away - if people are having to ask theyre in a bad situation and place.

on one occasion i was giving a couple of quid and some smash to a youngish 20 odd of age woman - when another person passed me by and a few seconds later as i walked away said "it'll all go on drink and drugs"

i said to this person - "if i was on the streets and having to ask strangers for money, nowhere to live or wash and without a change of clothes - id be spending it on drink and drugs as well - there but for the grace of god go i & you"

i couldnt care less about what they spend it on- if i give out around £5/6 to 2 or 3 different people - its the price of a pint and it wouldnt do me any harm to have one less pint, but it would give 3 other people a little bit of something good, even if its to realise that not all humans are cold heartless selfish cuuhnts.

the whole world is telling them everyday NO.


ive never had an ounce of trouble off a person speaking or asking me for some loose change.


A little more soul and a little less ego.
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You don’t care that you gave someone money to get drugs, thus enabling them to continue on their path? Weird.
 
I’ve very, very rarely had lip off people begging, but I never have cash on me so I always politely say no. I do make monthly donations to the charities though.

I walk down Euston Road a few times per month (often late at night) and it absolutely astounds me how many homeless there are. Every time I walk past I feel guilty and feel like dropping them all a twenty each but it’s just not feasible is it, and even if I could afford it I’ve no idea if it is the right choice.
 
B-Man said:
You don’t care that you gave someone money to get drugs, thus enabling them to continue on their path? Weird.
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Do you think that people with a life destroying addiction to drugs would give it up because they don’t have enough cash?
The idea that if you give a homeless person cash you’re enabling them to feed their addictions is a bit of a binary way of looking at the problem.
 
When I worked at a restaurant we gave some of the leftovers and mistaken orders we had to the homeless in our area every night, most of the time we'd get good responses and thankful people, unfortunately on some occasion they told us no they just wanted money, sometimes quite aggressive. Drugs and alcohol is a plague on society.
 
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