I know we've had this one before mate but there's the telling line above in bold.
Our stats, Boro's stats, the stats that actuall matter, don't suggest we are getting any less than we deserve.
We concede more than we score. We lose more than we win. No clean sheets. 1 win in 8 games. These are the stats that matter, not how many forward passes you have, possession you have, chances you create, how many chances you limit the opposition to.
Unlucky moments can happen in games.. but not 8, 9 and 10 games. Failures then become and internal issue that we have to address, not the footballing gods.
When Boro start defending properly, taking our chances, winning games, keeping clean sheets.. the things you need to do to win football games, I'll start thinking we're on to something.
Pointing the finger at bad luck or refs over a prolonged stretch of games is just excuses.
You don't miss out on your objectives over the course of a season because you're a brilliant team but you're unlucky.
Sunderland's in-depth stats/ chances paint a very different picture to ours, they're shown to deserve less, but your mate is looking through rose-tinted glasses, saying they deserve more.
Boro's in-depth stats/ chances show we deserve far, far more (assuming our finishing and keeper can perform at average levels). Not enough to put us top 3, but enough for 4th to 8th, which considering who we've played very is good. But as a measure of who has got what they deserve the least, then we're second. The only other team done over more than us in that respect is WBA, and Luton/ Swansea just behind us. I think some of ours can be explained by us not converting chances which we should expect to, our players are not bad at finishing, not as bad as they've been this year anyway, I would expect better. The goals against is easy to see, a lot of long-range efforts have gone in, and I don't think our keepers are bad at stopping them, they've just been good strikes.
There are other teams who have largely had good luck, or put away more chances than they should expect to, or where the opposition have not put away their chances, teams like Milwall, Wigan and even Watford. Watford have largely got away with missed chances against them, but they've scored more than expected but I'd expect that with the players who they have (good finishers, well above this level).
Stats like xG might not mean much to you, but they mean an awful lot to every professional team, and they're the best overall stat which Opta produces, who are the market leaders in this. Compared to shots, shots on target and possession, these stats are night and day. Our xG points is 6 lower than the norm,
Also, if any other team has had so many bad decisions which have led to opposition goals then I would love to see it, we know we've had at least three, probably four, which is a third of the goals we've conceded, that's going to really hurt, and it has done. I don't recall us getting any key decisions which should have been fouls which have led to us scoring, but would love to see this also. Same as we've missed out on a couple of penalties at least, but I've not really mentioned these, as we've got away with a couple of other decisions (albeit less serious) in games where these have happened.
We've not had 8,9,10 games where we've been unlucky, we've only played 7 and we've been very unlucky in four, maybe five, and lucky in one (Swansea). You can't think we massively deserved the Swansea game, because we won it, surely?
The odds of being unlucky in 5 games out of 7, is about 25%, which probably explains why there are around 6 teams who look hard done by on the stats, 6 which look like they've got more than they should have, and around 12 in the middle.
The failures are not scoring chances, that is a player's fault, it's not a team or style fault. Like I say, I don't think our players are worse than average in that respect, so we should have got more. Conceding worldies isn't a failure, and that can largely be attributed to luck.
It is an excuse, but it's a legitimate one, until the refs decisions start to go for us, or teams start missing more chances than they should do. An excuse is fine if it is legitimate.
I've not said we've been brilliant, I've said we deserve to have around 4-6 more points based on chances, which considering who we've played is very good, assuming we do better against lesser teams that's play-off material or above. Being brilliant has nothing to do with bad decisions though.
Loads of teams have missed out on objectives largely due to luck, it's a game of extremely fine margins, it doesn't take much to tip an individual games balance. Then it's not unheard of to have that happen against you over a short number of games. It then becomes difficult to get that back, we're no more likely to be lucky tonight, because we've been unlucky previous.