Stress/depression/anxiety/mental health issues

Wtf said:
this..... I am the same, thank god :)
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A little bit of humour wtf if you don't mind.
An example of my wife being understanding was that one day I was in a particularly low mood. I was sat at the dining table and my wife, recognising that I was lower than usual, came to me and put her arms around me and pulled me into her chest. I wear hearing aids and I started to hear Radio Two in them. The wire in my wifes bra was acting as an aerial. We both laughed but I got a gentle slap when I asked if I could fine tune it.
Stay safe wtf and everyone else too.
 
atypical_boro said:
TBF though they're just websites. They didn't force the world to buy into them en masse and become addicted etc. I don't personally think they're to 'blame' for mental health issues in the world. As FH says, they've always been there, people used to just deny them more and believe people were 'fruitcakes' or whatever if they sought help to deal with stress/anxiety/insecurity etc. Lots of people still do.
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I think there is a platform provided now to allow people to present a false image of their life and world, which puts pressure on others to aspire to that, or measure their life against it. People see folk with fancy cars and diamond rings on white beaches and in blue seas in their designer clothes, or new mums all glammed up looking like they’ve just stepped off the cat walk rather than an exhausted mess etc etc and then question why they don’t have that or struggle through the day with a new baby etc and deem themself to be failing. Maybe it’s more of a pressure among girls but it’s definitely real - feeling a failure because you don’t have all those nice (superficial) things in your world, or you look like a normal new mum does, rather than these fake instagram staged shot models.
I guess that has always existed in magazines but the exposure given by platforms like Instagram is so vast now.
As for Facebook, the huge volume of allowed pure evil manipulation and fake news on there undoubtedly creates anger, paranoia, and anxiety among some.

HarryVegas said:
To be frank, I think social media is a help regarding mental health, rather than a cause of people's struggles. It has generally made it easier to open up, which has to be a good thing, especially for guys. Hopefully, men can talk about their feelings and emotions much more freely these days, without being dismissed as soft - a 'puff'.
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I think that is true on this sort of social media platform (fmttm) especially where there is a large degree of anonymity.
 
FabioPorkpie said:
I think there is a platform provided now to allow people to present a false image of their life and world, which puts pressure on others to aspire to that, or measure their life against it. People see folk with fancy cars and diamond rings on white beaches and in blue seas in their designer clothes, or new mums all glammed up looking like they’ve just stepped off the cat walk rather than an exhausted mess etc etc and then question why they don’t have that or struggle through the day with a new baby etc and deem themself to be failing. Maybe it’s more of a pressure among girls but it’s definitely real - feeling a failure because you don’t have all those nice (superficial) things in your world, or you look like a normal new mum does, rather than these fake instagram staged shot models.
I guess that has always existed in magazines but the exposure given by platforms like Instagram is so vast now.
As for Facebook, the huge volume of allowed pure evil manipulation and fake news on there undoubtedly creates anger, paranoia, and anxiety among some.



I think that is true on this sort of social media platform (fmttm) especially where there is a large degree of anonymity.
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Well I do agree with most of that but I’m really not sure Zuckerberg intended it to go that way when he set up Facebook etc. And so I’m not sure he can be “blamed” as such. I mean it’s just the internet as a whole. But there magazines and what have you before that that still made women feel like ****.
 
atypical_boro said:
Well I do agree with most of that but I’m really not sure Zuckerberg intended it to go that way when he set up Facebook etc. And so I’m not sure he can be “blamed” as such. I mean it’s just the internet as a whole. But there magazines and what have you before that that still made women feel like ****.
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Fair point, I agree.
I think Zuckerberg accidentally created an absolute monster that is probably one of the most dangerous things in the world today.
 
Brian Marwood said:
Was that any different in the 60's and 70's though?
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The 60s and 70s job security was far greater you learn a trade you most likely have a job for life. These days you need two good incomes to support a family or get on the housing ladder. People had less money but were more financially secure. Prospects for the young now are really tough even a good degree doesnt guarantee success. Combine this with consumerism and the ills of social media and its a hugely stressful combination. Theres enormous pressure on the young to have it all through social media when the reality is its more difficult than ever to obtain.
 
I think it’s multi pronged tbh.

Firstly form a positive perspective more people are willing to open up about it. People who once upon a time would have been classed as kookie or the village weirdo, would now be accepted as having a routine mental health issue and willing to come forward about it.

2. stability - job stability got smashed to pieces after the 2008 financial crash. Working somewhere for 40 years was no longer an option, which had led to people being constantly worried about Job security.

3. Social media - social media has led to an environment where people are constantly judged by the success of there peers. It’s resulted in people only post the best version of themselves, leading to people constantly having to de with oneupmanshilp
 
There isn't a sngle person alive today who doesn't suffer from anxiety, stress, and depression at somepoint,if they say they don't they are either the exception to the rule or just bull*******, most people hide it, stiff upper lip stoicism and all that, i just think it's more acceptable to talk about it these days , years gone by your depression would always be compared to somebody who was worse off than you to dismiss your issues, as if that in itself was some magical cure, " how can you be sad or depressed or anxious, look at that soldier with his legs blown off etc", it doesn't really work that way, we are all unique organisms with our own hopes and dreams and fears, i actually think you need to suffer **** in life just to fully understand when true happiness comes your way, which is does usually in small pockets of time, to cherish it for what it is, like Dylan sang in idiot wind , "i haven't felt good for so long i can't remember what it's like", i think a lot of it can be mitigated with good diet and exercise and minimal amounts of alcohol drugs that totally **** your CNS and seratonin levels up, i can understand why people drink though, alcohol initially provides a euphoric effect and offers hope, at least for a few hours at least, at the expense of course of physical and mental long term destruction
 
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Gabriels Horn said:
There isn't a sngle person alive today who doesn't suffer from anxiety, stress, and depression at somepoint,if they say they don't they are either the exception to the rule or just bull*******, most people hide it, stiff upper lip stoicism and all that, i just think it's more acceptablel to talk about it these days , years gone by your depression woudl always be compared to somebody who was worse off than you to dismiss your issues, as if that initself was some magical cure, " how can you be sad or depressed or anxious, look at that soldier with his legs blown off etc"
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Agreed.
It doesnt matter that "there is someone worse off" - its how the person concerned is feeling and their experiences.(y)
It doesnt help them to understand and help themselves - it compounds the problem.
 
Ok. So I documented my struggles with my mental health on the old message board. I got some good advice, and I got some less good advice and I got some fairly horrible responses to a post I put up during lockdown 1 about suicide and lockdown which upset me. I still can’t take pills. I’ve tried no end of different ones. They just make me sick.

I got help. I was diagnosed as clinically depressed last November. The main cause being isolation and the lack of friends/relationships/a support network. I then got ignored by the local well-being service until may when I cracked up during lockdown. Eventually got on a list for therapy but it’s video based and I really find it hard to connect with the therapist.

Like most I was Forced to work at home with little or no contact with others in March. I Ended up Taking 6 weeks off work with severe depression as was unable to cope during July/August. Work make noises about supporting mental health but nothing practical in terms of support. They’ve moved on now to equality and diversity as their latest buzz word as they have a problem mainly employing white middle class people. Nothing has changed since I returned, I lost it the other day in a virtual meeting with some moronic developers in India who fkd something up I was working on and stormed off: it’s awful. It’s a horrible affliction that I just can’t shake off. I get angry about stupid things I push everyone away and I drink too much to hide it but At least I know now I’m doing it !

anyway on the positive side I started walking to get out the house in lockdown. Did long distance walks across the public footpaths and the villages all spring and summer. Some nights I walked 11 miles plus. And that walking turned to running, and I can now run 10k in 1hr 15mins. Never gonna be the fastest but an achievement I’m bloody proud of. I put it on Strava and I’ve half a dozen colleagues from work who follow my progress. Costing me a blunming fortune in running gear though.
So for anyone suffering There’s hope but it’s a bloody long hard battle to win the war🙁
 
Aet290204 said:
Ok. So I documented my struggles with my mental health on the old message board. I got some good advice, and I got some less good advice and I got some fairly horrible responses to a post I put up during lockdown 1 about suicide and lockdown which upset me. I still can’t take pills. I’ve tried no end of different ones. They just make me sick.

I got help. I was diagnosed as clinically depressed last November. The main cause being isolation and the lack of friends/relationships/a support network. I then got ignored by the local well-being service until may when I cracked up during lockdown. Eventually got on a list for therapy but it’s video based and I really find it hard to connect with the therapist.

Like most I was Forced to work at home with little or no contact with others in March. I Ended up Taking 6 weeks off work with severe depression as was unable to cope during July/August. Work make noises about supporting mental health but nothing practical in terms of support. They’ve moved on now to equality and diversity as their latest buzz word as they have a problem mainly employing white middle class people. Nothing has changed since I returned, I lost it the other day in a virtual meeting with some moronic developers in India who fkd something up I was working on and stormed off: it’s awful. It’s a horrible affliction that I just can’t shake off. I get angry about stupid things I push everyone away and I drink too much to hide it but At least I know now I’m doing it !

anyway on the positive side I started walking to get out the house in lockdown. Did long distance walks across the public footpaths and the villages all spring and summer. Some nights I walked 11 miles plus. And that walking turned to running, and I can now run 10k in 1hr 15mins. Never gonna be the fastest but an achievement I’m bloody proud of. I put it on Strava and I’ve half a dozen colleagues from work who follow my progress. Costing me a blunming fortune in running gear though.
So for anyone suffering There’s hope but it’s a bloody long hard battle to win the war🙁
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Have you considered contacting Access To Work for support at work?

https://www.gov.uk/access-to-work

Overview

If you’re disabled or have a physical or mental health condition that makes it hard for you to do your job, you can:
  • talk to your employer about changes they must make in your workplace
  • get extra help from Access to Work, including mental health support
Get help from Access to Work
If the help you need at work is not covered by your employer making reasonable adjustments, you may be able to get help from Access to Work.
You need to have a paid job, or be about to start or return to one.
You’ll be offered support based on your needs, which may include a grant to help cover the costs of practical support in the workplace. Your workplace can include your home if you work from there some or all of the time.
An Access to Work grant can pay for:
  • special equipment, adaptations or support worker services to help you do things like answer the phone or go to meetings
  • help getting to and from work
You might not get a grant if you already get certain benefits.
The money does not have to be paid back and will not affect your other benefits.

Get mental health support

You can apply for Access to Work to get mental health support, or contact a Mental Health Support Service provider directly.


* This is not advice - only signposting.
* They are extremely helpful(y)
 
Oh I’m not sure anyone could do anything. Option 1 is work from home with little or no contact, option 2 is go into work in a grim “covid secure” office with very few people around. I’ve moaned and groaned and even made suggestions about how we could stay connected but I’ve just been ignored by mgmt.
 
Social media plays a huge part in these problems imo, Ive seen relationships destroyed because of it. Ive tried it to find a 'soul mate' but never achieved it and thats just due to the nature of the beast, its so easy to find people to talk to that people are always after some one 'better'. I feel like its eroded that connection between 2 people as its never allowed to fully develop in the first place, its cheapened the whole experience of finding that special person as you can easily have 3/4/5 of those 'special people' on the go at the same time. Maybe its just me, im not interested in the whole hook up culture, finding someone else who isnt seems to be nigh on impossible.
I have nothing of any meaning, I have to throw myself into work just as a distraction. Outside of work I have no close mates, cant meet anyone I connect with, I just float around entertaining myself even football has lost its meaning to me now. The way your lives have been during lockdown has been my daily life probably for the last 4 years, lockdown had literally zero affect on my lifestyle
However close I get to it though I refuse to break down, I know there is better 'somewhere' around the corner I just have to keep trying to get to it.
 
JL2020 said:
Social media plays a huge part in these problems imo, Ive seen relationships destroyed because of it. Ive tried it to find a 'soul mate' but never achieved it and thats just due to the nature of the beast, its so easy to find people to talk to that people are always after some one 'better'. I feel like its eroded that connection between 2 people as its never allowed to fully develop in the first place, its cheapened the whole experience of finding that special person as you can easily have 3/4/5 of those 'special people' on the go at the same time. Maybe its just me, im not interested in the whole hook up culture, finding someone else who isnt seems to be nigh on impossible.
I have nothing of any meaning, I have to throw myself into work just as a distraction. Outside of work I have no close mates, cant meet anyone I connect with, I just float around entertaining myself even football has lost its meaning to me now. The way your lives have been during lockdown has been my daily life probably for the last 4 years, lockdown had literally zero affect on my lifestyle
However close I get to it though I refuse to break down, I know there is better 'somewhere' around the corner I just have to keep trying to get to it.
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Hang in there fella, you are smashing it, self aware and know what you're after.
 
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