Laughing
Well-known member
I like that.
Dad Jokes - all welcome!
- Thread starter FatCat
- Start date
Trump went on a fact-finding visit to Israel. While on a tour of Jerusalem he suffered a heart attack and keeled over...pffffffffffft!
After all the hubbub at the hospital
died down the carcass was
removed to a funeral parlor.
The undertaker told the diplomats accompanying him, "You can have him shipped home for $50,000 or you can bury him here in the Holy Land for just $100."
The American diplomats huddled in
a corner to discuss these options.
They returned to the undertaker and told him they want him shipped home.
The undertaker, puzzled, asked, "Why would you spend $50K to ship him home when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $100?"
One of the diplomats replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and 3 days later he rose from the dead. We just can't take the risk."
After all the hubbub at the hospital
died down the carcass was
removed to a funeral parlor.
The undertaker told the diplomats accompanying him, "You can have him shipped home for $50,000 or you can bury him here in the Holy Land for just $100."
The American diplomats huddled in
a corner to discuss these options.
They returned to the undertaker and told him they want him shipped home.
The undertaker, puzzled, asked, "Why would you spend $50K to ship him home when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $100?"
One of the diplomats replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and 3 days later he rose from the dead. We just can't take the risk."
sweet_left_foot
Well-known member
lovejoy division
Last edited:
ThePrisoner
Well-known member
sweet_left_foot
Well-known member
Where does a mansplainer get water from?
A well actually
A well actually
Brian Marwood
Well-known member
I bought my Mum a new fridge at the weekend. You should have seen her face light up when she opened it.
dooderooni
Well-known member
Just had a massive argument with the missus about me stopping doing my flamingo impression.
I had to put my foot down.
I had to put my foot down.
ThePrisoner
Well-known member
NorthumberlandBoro
Well-known member
My wife called to tell me she saw a fox on the way to work. I asked her how she knew it was on its way to work. She hung up.
sweet_left_foot
Well-known member
I swallowed invisible ink, went straight to A&E.
...waiting to be seen.
...waiting to be seen.
NorthumberlandBoro
Well-known member
My wife yelled from upstairs and asked, “Do you ever get a shooting pain across your body, like someone's got a voodoo doll of you and they're stabbing it?” I replied, “No.” She responded, “How about now?”
dooderooni
Well-known member
I went into the bakers today and everything was 50p except this one plain cake which was £1.
I asked the baker why that single cake was more expensive than the others .
"That's Madeira cake" they said.
I asked the baker why that single cake was more expensive than the others .
"That's Madeira cake" they said.
