Blf
Well-known member
No doubting he will have hit laugh instead of like mate.
ADHD in adults
- Thread starter GibbosEmpire
- Start date
OneJonOnTeesside
New member
Interesting as there are times with me where the obsessive behaviours dip. It's probably worth being conscious of when times are good/bad and understanding why. Sometimes it's obvious, stress at work or worried about something
parmoboy
Well-known member
I'm beginning to wonder whether I could have it. I get bored very easily and struggle to concentrate - it's one of the reasons why I struggle to watch films or TV series, I just get bored midway through the first episode and end up switching it off.
I've been feeling quite stressed recently because of my teeth. I didn't look after them as well as I should have done in my younger years and they're all worn down. My dentist told me I may need a full mouth reconstruction, which I can't afford and I don't really want to lose my natural teeth, even though they're not in a great condition.
I brush them twice a day now but I can't stand at the sink and brush them. I have to walk out of the bathroom and walk about in my kitchen, whilst trying not to spill toothpaste on the floor.
I'm reflecting back now and wondering if this was a big factor as to why I was reluctant to brush them on a regular basis back in the day.
I've been feeling quite stressed recently because of my teeth. I didn't look after them as well as I should have done in my younger years and they're all worn down. My dentist told me I may need a full mouth reconstruction, which I can't afford and I don't really want to lose my natural teeth, even though they're not in a great condition.
I brush them twice a day now but I can't stand at the sink and brush them. I have to walk out of the bathroom and walk about in my kitchen, whilst trying not to spill toothpaste on the floor.
I'm reflecting back now and wondering if this was a big factor as to why I was reluctant to brush them on a regular basis back in the day.
oliver reed
Member
Hi, I was diagnosed at the start of this year, I'm now 53, so had spent 52 and a half years on this planet with it and not known. My eldest was diagnosed just before Christmas and when I looked into it, I had most of the traits. I'd never gave it a second thought. I like a lot of people thought it was for 10-year-old boys!
Now my life so far makes so much sense, the school reports of 'smart but not interested' was a common theme. Most of my working life has been down to learned behaviours, although issues such as speaking out of term, or calling BS without a regard for the consequences has backfired a few times, this being part of the 'have to get it out and speak your mind'. Some of the symptoms can be a hassle, forgetfulness, lost phones (5 in one year!), lost keys, lost wallets. procrastination, starting but not finishing jobs, a perceived lack of empathy due to being literal. I don't do boring things, or I try to avoid them. If I have something boring at work, chances are it won't get done. Relationship-wise has been hard, probably not so much for me, but definitely for my wife.
There have been a lot of positives. I spoke about it at a work session about Neurodiversity about my lived experience and told people I wouldn't have been sitting here (probably) if I'd been diagnosed years before. We've enjoyed a good lifestyle, I've had a good career, but if I had known years ago, would I have followed the same pathway? most likely not. I work in the oil and gas industry, spent years offshore in technical roles, now office based with a totally different role, which I love. Dealing with multiple scopes, departments, people inside and outside my company on a daily basis is right up my street! I am very sociable, friendly and seemingly know everyone, as my colleagues say!
I now take 'dexies' (dexamphetamine) and the chaos in my brain that was my norm, is now much more structured. Medication is not for everyone I know, but it has helped me immensely. I would best describe my previous life as 'ideas/thoughts in a whirlwind' and I was reaching in, just grabbing the first thought or idea that I could or that suited me. There was no hierarchy involved, they weren't in any given order of priority, just chaos, and I chose 'best guess', or whatever suited me!
I was advised by the psychiatrist to have a 'day off' the dexies after a month. This was one of my worst ever days, it was like someone had opened multiple taps of information and it was all rushing into my brain, this was a horrible chaotic feeling, but it was how I had lived my life pre-diagnosis. I have no desire to go back to those days.
Work has been very supportive, and we are actively targeting neurodiverse candidates when hiring for some roles. So, for the person worrying about finding a job due to being neurodiverse, don't! One of our assets is, we think outside the box, this type of thinking has been recognised by some companies as a positive, which it is. Diversity is big in the workplace at the moment (it certainly is here in Australia), that includes diversity of thought, which being an ADHDer definitely has.
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NoloBoro
Well-known member
The medication helps a lot. Pomodoro timers are useful. Personally, I would describe it more as attention overload, as in on lots of things at once, rather than a real deficit.
The other day, I was working out in the garage, weeding/watering the garden, tidying the inside of the car, pretty much at the same time. My wife is exasperated a lot of the time, sometimes it makes her laugh.
I think it can be hard on the folks you live with.
The other day, I was working out in the garage, weeding/watering the garden, tidying the inside of the car, pretty much at the same time. My wife is exasperated a lot of the time, sometimes it makes her laugh.
I think it can be hard on the folks you live with.
ThatFragranceGuy
Well-known member
Littlejimmy
Well-known member
Hard relate with this. When I do housework or cook something it's in a manic, chaotic order, jumping from one task to another, forgetting what I was doing, thinking of something else I need to do, jumping back to the first task, etc.
Will check out this Pomodoro thing.
wyliefan
Well-known member
I must say I'm often like this but have never put it down to anything.
NoloBoro
Well-known member
Also found out late. school was torture, didn’t do well at all, despite being extremely bright as a kid. Categorised as naughty, lectured constantly about how I lacked self discipline and had to apply myself.
Sky plus has been a godsend while watching TV, allows me to pause and go about other things.
No patience whatsoever, get really annoyed in queues, traffic, any form of waiting for anything.
Amazon prime, I hammer it, sometimes paying over the odds for things because I can’t wait.
Lack of dopamine in system means I’m constantly seeking pleasure, at one point I’d get it wherever I could, drugs, sex, skipping boring stuff to always do what I felt like.
Can never sit still, can’t sit with the missus for long, despite loving her company.
My long suffering wife has been my saviour, so kind and patient, she’s the only person who really gets me.
Have a dual diagnosis, also suffer with Bipolar, had weeks on end in true despair, followed by ridiculous highs, real excitement for no reason whatsoever, in one of these episodes, I found god, lost him since but actually believed I was a new messiah and gods messenger, didn’t tell anyone, well almost nobody.
Understanding what’s happening has been helpful, also torturous, you feel such frustration, real regret and sadness at what things could have been, what you could have achieved.
Now take medication, Lamotrigine and Methylphenidate, what people understand to be Ritalin, that’s just a brand name.
Was initially prescribed anti depressants when I asked for help, they turned me inside out, one of the brands, I swear I could’ve killed somebody, there was a road rage incident when I told a bloke if I had to get out of my car I was going to kill him, I meant it.
You need to be kind to yourself, there are books that help you understand what ADHD is, one is called The silent struggle, it’s a good read, the sort of thing you can pick up and put down, a good thing if you catch my drift.
Sorry for rambling, it’s a thing I tend to do.
NoloBoro
Well-known member
Could lose my keys 4 times before leaving the house. Lose my train of thought when talking to someone and walk away.
When I get interested in something it becomes an obsession, can’t tear Myself away from it, no matter what’s happening.
Short term memory is shocking, will look down and realise the thing I had in my hand, paintbrush, pen, book, keys is no longer there
I’m 47 now, I reckon I’ve spent 25 of those years looking for things I’ve lost.
Anyone on her with ADHD have trouble with sleep issues, I get sleep paralysis a lot, sometimes I convince myself my house is haunted, sounds crazy, maybe it is??
When I get interested in something it becomes an obsession, can’t tear Myself away from it, no matter what’s happening.
Short term memory is shocking, will look down and realise the thing I had in my hand, paintbrush, pen, book, keys is no longer there
I’m 47 now, I reckon I’ve spent 25 of those years looking for things I’ve lost.
Anyone on her with ADHD have trouble with sleep issues, I get sleep paralysis a lot, sometimes I convince myself my house is haunted, sounds crazy, maybe it is??
GibbosEmpire
Well-known member
Yeh sleep is ****, wake up at 6 or 7am every morning regardless and can't go back to sleep. I used to get sleep paralysis alot when I was younger, like once a week it was so bad, last episode was about 4 years ago.
Littlejimmy
Well-known member
Oh man, all so relatable. I had a meltdown last night after some stuff I ordered from Amazon didn't arrive. I took it personally, as I do with a lot of stuff. Ended up self-medicating with a large scotch or two, which is the kind of behaviour I really need to knock on the head (the psychologist said so). Will definitely look up that book.
Didn't realise sleep paralysis was connected too. I used to get that quite a bit. Not had it for ages, thank God. Scared me shitless.
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GibbosEmpire
Well-known member
Recently came back from being in Asia for a long trip, lost my very expensive camera on a local bus in Nepal after being there for only a week, it was above me and about 5 minutes before we got off I was saying to myself "get the camera bag you'll forget it", we got off and walked 10 minutes before I realised the camera bag was on the bus, ran back and the bus had gone, managed to get to the depot where the bus went and the bag was gone in the space of 10 minutes, also lost my girlfriends headphones. In the past I've lost phones, passports, keys, glasses, wallets, bank cards, it's so exhausting, and expensive to lose things.
atypical_boro
Well-known member
What is the process after you've been diagnosed? I appreciate in a lot of cases it gives people an explanation about certain personality traits or behaviours, but its not like it can be 'cured' can it?
There is a huge rise in adult diagnoses. Apparently 7% of the world has it, but its rising. At what point does something stop being a 'disorder'?
There is a huge rise in adult diagnoses. Apparently 7% of the world has it, but its rising. At what point does something stop being a 'disorder'?
Alan_Breck
Well-known member
My sister-in-law has just been diagnosed ADHD, she is 70 and a retired GP. The condition knows no boundaries to whom it affects.
#UTB
#UTB
GibbosEmpire
Well-known member
For me I can now use it to my benefit for work, before it was a hindrance without knowing it was a hindrance, now I can use it to my advantage and use it as a strength istead of a weakness. It also explains alot about my behavior with friends and family, relationships and gives me comfort that I wasn't just lazy, forgetful, not interested, or didn't apply myself.
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Boroshirtmuseum
Active member
love the 25 years lost comment haha.I am exactly the same, tend to lose keys and phones, I also get sleep paralysis.
I think its due to the brain being active at night and unable to switch off.
I come active at night and often go out at 10pm for a couple of pints, craving the dopamine hit.
Useless on a morning, could stay in bed until mod morning.
Its only just clicked that I have this and im early 40s. I have done well in my life so far, I wish I knew about it earlier though as it certainly has answered a few questions.
Littlejimmy
Well-known member
I think it depends on the severity and type. I would have been going on meds but for my dodgy tikka (it goes poppadum, poppadum), but instead am getting referred for CBT to help me manage it. I will also get a letter to show HR/managers at work so they are aware of my issue.
Boroshirtmuseum
Active member
I dont want to go down medication route.
Therapy does help.
My routine now is when i get to work, or even when i start a day on a weekend, spend 10 minutes brainstorming and writing a list of what you want to achieve in that day. Even simple things like go to the shop or fill car up with petrol.
When working at my desk I set a timer on 30 minutes which i am not allowed to google anything or look at my phone.
Every 30 mins I can then look at anything for 5 mins as a treat. This helps me stay focused.
Have post it or even a permanent sign on your dashboard in your car saying KEYS and PHONE.
Trains your brain to check you have them before you drive off.
Post it or sign in your room/kitchen etc saying keep tidy.
To someone who does not relate to this it sounds bizarre, but it really helps
Johngannonsunderpants
Well-known member
I have it. It explains a lot. I nearly drowned as a baby which is most likely the cause. I think the problem is that lots of people think they have it and say they have such and such symptoms but those symptoms are often something else, such as trauma or a head injury.
Ultimately if you didn't have it as a child you don't have it now. Usually comes from a traumatic birth (see tyson fury born weighing less than 2lb). While I'm not keen on using him as an example (snobby reasons) if you watch any of the TV programmes it's so obvious, when stimulated he's high as a kite and when he's not he looks like falling asleep and is distracted / not interested and just wants to go for a run with his dog. Im very much the same.
It's impact as we get older should be less so, unless you have something such as a head injury to exacerbate it (makes it worse, doesn't cause it).
Medication is a big help and the simplest was to confirm diagnosis is to take a stimulant, if it slows your brain/thoughts down you may well have adhd (although I'm not advocating doing that).
Ultimately if you didn't have it as a child you don't have it now. Usually comes from a traumatic birth (see tyson fury born weighing less than 2lb). While I'm not keen on using him as an example (snobby reasons) if you watch any of the TV programmes it's so obvious, when stimulated he's high as a kite and when he's not he looks like falling asleep and is distracted / not interested and just wants to go for a run with his dog. Im very much the same.
It's impact as we get older should be less so, unless you have something such as a head injury to exacerbate it (makes it worse, doesn't cause it).
Medication is a big help and the simplest was to confirm diagnosis is to take a stimulant, if it slows your brain/thoughts down you may well have adhd (although I'm not advocating doing that).